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Posts Tagged ‘germphobic’

For so many, many areas of life, there seem to be clear divisions into two separate factions. Things about which people feel SO STRONGLY, so fanatical, there is no middle ground. I love coming across these moments of schism. Here are a few I’ve come across recently.

Butter Storage: You either store your butter on the counter, or you store it in the fridge. I am Team Counter Butter all the way. It’s soft and spreadable when you need it, and if you go through butter at the rate my family does, it never has a chance to go rancid.

Shower Time: I used to be a Morning Shower person, but now I tend to shower at night for purposes of convenience. However, I HATE IT. No way am I going to take the time to dry and style my hair when all I want to do is go to bed. But I also hate sleeping on wet hair! It’s a nightmare! Showering in the morning is the better option. (I suppose there is a secret third category here, of people who shower after they exercise, or people who shower multiple times per day.) 

Hair Washing: I wash my hair as infrequently as I can get away with it, which is usually every three to four days – although I can squeeze in a fifth day if go for a bun or a ponytail. Daily Hair Washers are aghast at this, though. They cannot comprehend having “dirty” hair. But oh, how wonderful it is to not have to dry my hair every day! (I cannot wash and wear my hair; it’s wavy/curly but more so on one side than the other; it looks awful if I let it dry by itself.) Also, I am convinced that Day 3 Hair is the best hair day of them all.

Drinking Vessel Material: My husband prefers to drink water etc. out of a plastic cup. I cannot STAND this. I need a glass glass every time. There is something revolting to me about the feel of a plastic rim between my lips or something. Yuck.

Pillow Quantity: While I like the aesthetic of a nice big pile of pillows on my bed, I cannot sleep with more than one. It gives me a crick in my neck just thinking about it! My husband needs three pillows though, and my daughter likes FOUR. I swear that their necks fold into a 90-degree angle from their bodies when they sleep, and it looks so uncomfortable. There is a secret third faction, though: the people who sleep with no pillows at all. I knew one of them in college and it was fascinating to me; he didn’t even own a pillow.

Thinking: I think in words. There is a constant stream of words running through my head, like the inner monologues you hear as voiceovers on TV. That’s how my brain works. It’s not really like hearing and it’s definitely not seeing words appear on a tickertape inside my head. But it’s words. My husband thinks in pictures. There is no flow of verbiage in his brain. Just images. If you ask him to visualize something, he can close his eyes and SEE THAT THING. I cannot do this. I just see blackness. 

Gifting: My husband’s family are Gift Listers. You send a list of things you’d be interested in receiving for birthdays/holidays, and then the gift givers choose something from that list. (It is understood that you might get something that is not on the list, and it is also understood that you can suggest categories of things – i.e., “coffee mug” – which allow the gift giver some freedom/leeway to make their own choices.) My family sometimes gives loose suggestsions, i.e. “books” or “things for entertaining.” But there are no lists. The gift is to be a surprise.

Snack Procurement: Picture, if you will (or, if you can), a tin of nuts or a bag of chips. You are about to procure some for your snacking purposes. Do you a) reach your hand into the tin/bag and grab a handful? Or do you b) pour the desired amount into a bowl/napkin/hand? I am a Snack Pourer all the way! I don’t want your hand – or mine! – rooting around in the entire container of food! I want to keep the food pure, and untouched until the last possible moment. Likewise, I am always going to close the container and put it back. If I desire more of the snack, I will get it out of the pantry and pour some more. Some people in my family prefer to keep the open box/tin/bag on the counter, just in case. UGH. I do not like this! 

Bathing: This is a late addition after Elisabeth’s post this morning reminded me how much I loathe baths. And yet some people LOVE them! They are supposed to be decadent and soothing, and yet… I find myself getting restless and itchy about two minutes in. And then I feel like I still have to shower to get all the bubbles off me anyway, so what’s the point? I grew up in a home with no bathtubs (although my parents renovated my bathroom when I was in… high school? and put in a bath), so maybe that has something to do with why I have no use for baths at all.

All right. That’s enough controversy for today. Do you feel particularly strongly about any of these topics? What else have you found is A Great Divider? (Besides politics, of course.) 

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